i don't like sucking hair
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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