at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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