jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize