Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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