There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize