i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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