when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I showed him my bush... on skype.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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