She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
i just google imaged poop.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Randomize
