His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Randomize
