You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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