Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize