Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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