i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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