I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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