i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
only you would photoshop your dick
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
