And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
