why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
