omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize