Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize
