Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
