Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
he shaved USA in his pubs
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
