how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
