But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
