i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I will pee on everything he values.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
