i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
