He asked to "fluff my boner.."
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
