We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize