I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
