i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize