Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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