bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Enjoy the penises
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
