I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I don't deserve a penis
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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