So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
