im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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