he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
