I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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