I never want to see another naked old woman again.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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