North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
