So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
