There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
