i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
