then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
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