at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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