the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I have aggressive nipples.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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