When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
