i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
