They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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