I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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