She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
