Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
