Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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