SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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